• Tori The Double Pisces

Uranus in Taurus starts....now! A personal perspective.

And here's the little bugger that started this party.

Yeah, I woke up to a message wishing me a "Happy Uranus in Taurus Day." Around lunchtime, I saw it flicker on my FB timeline as well, Uranus has just entered Taurus at 0 Degrees.

Let the suffering begin.

Maybe not for everyone. But for me, with my glass half empty of vodka in Saturn Rising, my Ascendant (Rising Sign, or how you appear to everyone else and you as a person) at critical 29 degrees (the end of the cycle, learn your lessons or karma opens up a can of whoop a$$ on you) and both Venus and Mars in Taurus in the 12th house of secrets and your own undoing...needless to say I count the days until 2026 when Gemini can have their turn, and odds are they will love every minute of it. Bastards.

My Mother says I should take this time to thrive and make my mark in the world.

Here's me thriving, making my mark, slumming and looking confused, wishing I knew what to do with my superpowers...

I'd like to say I'm kidding, but that's pretty much my uniform, making Comic Con a breeze for me.

AH Uranus, you rebel with your leather, biker boots, and lady-like red lipstick.

In the meantime, there's a lot of this being whispered in my ear...

I think I own pieces of Bitcoin. It doesn't matter though, as I am locked out of my account.

Of course, it makes perfect sense that the sign of money, Taurus, merges beautifully with the planet of technology, Uranus. Combined, they create a symphony of currency that'll make or break countries and classes, creating a new caste system that can be seen the world over. Poor people become rich, the way Uranus likes it. Rich people become richer, the way Taurus likes it. Anarchy ensues, the way Uranus REALLY likes it.

But while all of this is going on, my Taurus, or rather Venus, is being put to the test at Couple's Counseling, where people go to have themselves validated by having a professional tell their partner that they themselves are wrong and should go to hell.

Actually, this is what happens when Uranus opposes Scorpio, which we will discuss ad nauseam next week.

An hour later, back in the car eating Jimmy John's, we critiqued our critiquer. (That's a word I just made up. I have Mercury in Aries and I like to make up words.) Neither one of us will admit it, but I think we both give a frown face that the therapist seems young enough to be our child. I don't need marriage advice from someone that isn't as old as my marriage. Second, we both agreed that the fact she took no history on our relationship was unprofessional to our high standards of therapeutic care. My husband and I have a history that would make even the most scandalous of Scorpios sit down and take notes, and that should have been discussed. Third, her suggestions were things my husband thought he come up with himself if left alone on a nice day during a cigar walk. But she was a nice girl for all intensive purposes, even though our next session wouldn't be for about five weeks out. So what's the point? Maybe Uranus just wanted us to have the perspective of youth and love? Either way, both my husband and I have too much Earth (Taurus) in our charts to buy what she was selling.

Probably not a good idea to start marital counseling on Uranus 0 degrees Taurus anyway. It's just too weird. Uranus sets us up for independence and solitude, when what we crave is Taurus's guidance and cohesiveness.

Upon further examination, is it really that abnormal to get sick of someone's face after looking at it for almost two decades? Granted, I worry what Uranus will do to my Venus when they conjunct. That's when my mother says I'll make some grand entry to the world. I beg to differ. That won't happen in the 12th house. But my Ashley Madison account may be discovered. Or worse, Nordstrom. Then $hit will really hit the fan.

Depending on what state you live in.

On a side note of this topic, one day Uranus will hit my Mars rising. All that chaos of Uranus combined with the spontaneity and fire of Mars, which is the ruling sign of my Mercury in said Aries. In my opinion, that should look/sound a little like this...


In the meantime, Uranus in Taurus isn't finished with its intro into my life quite yet. I'm sitting at home, doing my side hustle (online of course, again, Uranus/Technology = Taurus/Money) when I get an alert from the nice people who are supposed to be baby sitting my credit to be informed that my identity has been stolen...again.

I won't get into the gory details of it all, but needless to say that it was suggested to me that since my info is clearly for sale, perhaps it's not such a bad idea to entirely change my name, first and last. (Uranus) I explained the problem was my social security number. They pointed out that since the two won't clearly match, that should put an end to the shenanigans. Perhaps they have a point?


Again, we have Uranus, using technology to falsify information to get money. (Taurus.)

See the theme?

And Uranus just entered Taurus. It's nowhere near any of my personal planets (Mercury, Venus, Mars, Moon) at the moment, so just thing of all of the fun I'll have when it does hit Venus, Mars, and my Rising. Yes, Rising, again, how you appear to everyone else. Go back and play the "Crazy" (Uranus) song again or look at a confused Jessica Jones perplexed what to do with her talents but always looks awesome in her leather and a red lip. (Taurus)

There you have it, Uranus enters Taurus today and I feel it like a Mercury Retrograding all over my a$$. I guess all I can do is grin and bear it. Uranus doesn't really teach lessons so there's not much going on there, as it does come and cause chaos in the name of chaos's sake. Sort of like burning a house down just to watch it burn. It was there, as was the gas can, a rag, and a match. Let's see what happens when you combine them all.

And there's no way I can look at this objectively. No astrologer can really read their own chart. So I have to hunt someone down to hold my hand and say "There, there, you won't go broke because of your rampant online (Uranus) shopping addiction (Taurus). Go get a cause (Uranus) and back to animal advocacy (Taurus) so you can do that hoarder thing again." (Pisces)


Inked on my rib cage, yo. (Hurt like hell. Don't ink there. I know pain now.)

So in a way I say to Uranus "BRING IT," because, as you can see, I am the storm. (Taurus)

Uranus also rules Astrology so I expect to be doing a lot more of it. So don't be strangers and book appointments now while I'm all cheap because in October I have to charge grown up rates. Your Girl needs some coin. (Taurus) And for fun news and stuff you can sign up for the newsletter that I'll think about but never actually get to writing on the last tab of the website.

Again, how do you think Uranus in Taurus will effect you? Are you already feeling it? Are you like WTF who cares? Speak your mind, Boo.

*Memes = From all over Google Images, Though I'm going to say Toy Story from Pixar and Jessica Jones from Marvel.

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